i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
