I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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