Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
