If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
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