My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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