My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
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