there was a trapeze. enough said
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
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