I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
