If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
Randomize
