So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Randomize
