Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
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