so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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