i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
