Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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