omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
I think I am morally bankrupt
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Randomize
