I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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