Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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