dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Girls should come with a carfax report
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
they're like a gay fantastic four
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
