Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
