I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
