its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
