your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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