listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Randomize
