i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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