There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Randomize
