whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
