My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
