i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
