The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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