you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
