i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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