do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
