Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
