Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Randomize
