i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Randomize
