The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
