erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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