And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
Randomize
