are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
