He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
