Texts From Last Night · Beloved_Beale's Favorites

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Beloved_Beale's Favorites Texts:

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(655): View more from

Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?

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(415): View more from California

Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.

Fav 8 2624 761
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(289): View more from Ontario

Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.

(1-919): View more from North Carolina

Hopefully she would park on my face.

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(573): View more from Missouri

My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.

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(209): View more from California

What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?

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(336): View more from North Carolina

Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.

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(704): View more from North Carolina

all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.

Fav 9 3856 1266
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