Texts From Last Night · buzzin's Favorites

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry sdbird hasn't picked any favorites yet.

buzzin's Favorites Texts:

Sort By: Date Favorited / Date Posted / Good Night / Bad Night

ADVERTISEMENT

(864): View more from South Carolina

I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?

Fav 4 4800 1273
share tweet
(610): View more from Pennsylvania

connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear

Fav 22 3395 1035
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(479): View more from Arkansas

Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.

Fav 13 3205 2551
share tweet
(830): View more from Texas

If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice

Fav 37 4190 1199
share tweet
(613): View more from Ontario

New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.

Fav 3 2086 941
share tweet
(956): View more from Texas

Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."

Fav 25 15048 1717
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(214): View more from Texas

Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.

Fav 47 1379 6770
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(630): View more from Illinois

Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"

(1-630): View more from Illinois

Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.

Fav 11 1270 3002
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT