Texts From Last Night · johndeereNC11's Favorites

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johndeereNC11's Favorites Texts:

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(360): View more from Washington

Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?

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(479): View more from Arkansas

Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.

(1-479): View more from Arkansas

How have you survived this long?

(479): View more from Arkansas

Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.

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(628): View more from California

That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.

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(601): View more from Mississippi

You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.

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