Texts From Last Night · possum_attack's Favorites

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possum_attack's Favorites Texts:

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(209): View more from California

I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force

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(309): View more from Illinois

I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON

(309): View more from Illinois

THE MOOOOOOOON

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(773): View more from Illinois

yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"

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(607): View more from New York

I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out

(253): View more from Washington

why what happened?

(607): View more from New York

Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.

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(+61): View more from Australia

The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.

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(218): View more from Minnesota

I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.

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(248): View more from Michigan

He keeps bees of course he's weird

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(845): View more from New York

You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"

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