Last Night in California (213)

Sort By: Date / Good Night / Bad Night

ADVERTISEMENT

• (213): View more from California

  And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at

  Fav 5 2018 780

  share tweet
  

• (213): View more from California

  hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"

  Fav 17 1351 1260

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (323): View more from California

  I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward

  (213): View more from California

  There's a lil minaj in everyone

  Fav 7 2033 1067

  share tweet
  

• (213): View more from California

  Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.

  (1-213): View more from California

  best text I've received ever.

  Fav 16 5350 1143

  share tweet
  

• (213): View more from California

  holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow

  Fav 5 1928 770

  share tweet
  

• (213): View more from California

  Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??

  Fav 25 3952 1486

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (213): View more from California

  My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."

  Fav 38 4009 1050

  share tweet
  

• (213): View more from California

  Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch

  Fav 8 2605 1089

  share tweet
  

• (213): View more from California

  I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.

  Fav 1 1083 2678

  share tweet
  

• (213): View more from California

  putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had

  Fav 2 1681 941

  share tweet
  

• (213): View more from California

  Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.

  Fav 5 2084 894

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (213): View more from California

  I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus

  Fav 5 1106 2047

  share tweet
  

• (213): View more from California

  The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.

  Fav 4 2443 1026

  share tweet
  

• (213): View more from California

  there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.

  Fav 11 2983 1307

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT