Last Night in South Carolina (843)

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  Hm. I declare blue a flavor.

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?

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