there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
We talked him into tasing himself.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
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