even my farts smell like vagina
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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