Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Randomize
