I want to stick my p in your. b.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
