Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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